Why I Couldn't Get into SIX the Musical Despite My Attempts To

Despite being fascinated with all things King Henry VIII and Tudor England, SIX is just not a musical I could get into despite my efforts. 

And there are several reasons why.

1) The set up/concept

SIX is set up as a pop concert instead of a full-fledged stage production musical. The six Queens-- Catherine of Aragon, Anne Boleyn,  Jane Seymour, Anna of Cleaves, Katherine Howard, and Catherine Parr--are pop stars in this musical. The six women establish a contest for who the band's lead singer will be based on which Queen had it the worst in her relationship with King Henry. 

2) Feminist interpretation

Let me be clear: What happened to these women was horrible. 

Catherine of Aragorn came to England, a foreign country, from Spain to marry Henry's older brother, Arthur, Prince of Wales. Several months after their elaborate and huge royal wedding, Arthur and Catherine contract an illness that is unknown to this day. Arthur dies of the illness, leaving Catherine a widow. For seven years, she struggled to maintain a decent living while her father, King Ferdinand of Aragon, and  Henry's father, King Henry VII squabbled over her dowry. Then, Henry VII died and Henry became King of England. He married Catherine, but had to get a papal dispensation in order to do so. They were married for 24 years and then, Henry wanted to annul their marriage, move Catherine out of the palace and into a convent, and move Anne Boleyn into the Queen's apartments. Despite Catherine and the Pope's objections, Henry gets his way. So a defiant Catherine dies the Dowager Princess of Wales instead of Queen of England. 

Anne Boleyn met the King while he was still married to Catherine of Aragon. By then, Henry's heart had left his marriage to Queen Catherine. Anne and King Henry courted for seven years. Then, Henry broke the English Church away from the Vatican in order to get his annulment and became Supreme Head of the Church of England. He married Anne, had her crowned Queen, and after three years of marriage, he had Anne accused and found guilty of adultery, incest, and treason because she failed to give him a son and heir. Yet her daughter, Elizabeth became a famous and strong English monarch. Anne was executed. 

Jane Seymour, who is my favorite of all of Henry's Queens, knew the King for a long time. She was a lady-in-waiting to Catherine of Aragon and Anne Boleyn. During his three year marriage to Anne Boleyn, Henry grew tired of Anne after she only gave him Elizabeth and began seeing Jane. The day after Anne's execution, Henry and Jane became engaged. 11 days after Anne's execution, Henry and Jane were married. Several months later, Jane became pregnant. Despite being Henry's favorite wife and the one he truly loved, Jane didn't have it any easier than any of the other wives. When she tried to interfere in state affairs, Henry reminded her of what had happened to her predecessor. So King Henry threatened Jane. Despite attempting to interfere in politics, Jane went about doing her wifely and queenly duties. Queen Jane also quietly furthered her own agenda, which included reconciling the Lady Mary Tudor, King Henry's eldest daughter by Catherine of Aragon, with her father and restoring her to the line of succession. She succeeded in the former, but not the latter. Jane gave birth to the long awaited son and heir, Edward. She died of natural causes two weeks after Edward's birth. Henry wore black for three months.

Two years after Jane's death, Henry was advised by one of his officials, Thomas Cromwell, to marry again. But this time, the marriage would be a political one in order to establish an alliance. After selecting several ladies of noble blood as potential brides, Cromwell sent the English court painter, Hans Holbein, to paint portraits of each of the selected women. Henry perused each of the portraits and really liked the one of Anna of Cleves, a young German princess. So Anna was summoned to England as Henry's fourth wife and Queen-to-be. But once the King met her in person, he changed his mind about her and tried to back out of the marriage. But he couldn't because this marriage was political in nature. So he reluctantly went through with the wedding. But he couldn't bring himself to consummate their marriage. After six months of marriage, Henry annulled the marriage on the grounds that Anna had a pre-contract with the son of the Duke of Lorraine and that their marriage was never consummated. But Anna got the best deal because she was known after the annulment as the King's beloved sister, she got several palaces, and a large fortune. 

Now, for wife #5: Henry met Katherine Howard during his marriage to Anna. Katherine was a lady-in-waiting to Queen Anna. He began seeing Katherine. After the annulment, the King married Katherine. And his sexual problems disappeared. But as usual, Henry grew tired of his wife and saw her less and less. Katherine began seeing one of the King's courtiers, Thomas Culpeper. Thomas Cranmer, the Archbishop of Canterbury, found out about Katherine's less than pure sexual past: she had been involved with two men when she was younger. Though one of those relationships was not consensual. Katherine's music teacher, Henry Mannox, had sexually assaulted her. The other relationship, which was with Francis Dereham, was consensual. Cranmer sent the King a letter about Queen Katherine's less than pristine sexual history. He was heartbroken and at first dismissed the accusations. But after a while, he had Katherine arrested. Despite the fact that her relationship with Mannox was not consensual, Katherine was put to death for treason and adultery. Dereham and Culpeper were also put to death, but Mannox was spared. Culpeper did not sleep with Katherine. 

About a year after Katherine's execution, King Henry met his sixth and final wife, Catherine Parr. Catherine was married to her second husband, John Neville, Baron Latimer, at the time, but he was very sick. He soon died and Catherine fell in love with Thomas Seymour, one of Queen Jane Seymour's brothers. But Thomas was not the only man who wanted Catherine as his wife. The King did, too, and he proposed to her. After praying about her course of action, Catherine accepted Henry's proposal, as saying "no" to the King of England was risky and unheard of. They were married. Their marriage lasted three years. Catherine outlived Henry by a year. 

So at the end of musical, all of the Queens except Jane rewrite their stories without Henry in them. Jane rewrites her ending so that she lives and stays with Henry, despite knowing that his heart is fickle. It's interesting that musical Queen Jane Seymour chooses to stay with Henry. Showtime's The Tudors' Queen Jane Seymour* was sweet, demure, and submissive while she was alive. She was supportive of King Henry. But in the final season, an ill and dying King Henry is visited by the ghosts of his first three wives. Jane gives it to Henry in a short speech. Her speech can be summed up to two words: You suck. 

But Jane doesn't tell Henry that he sucks because his heart is fickle. She criticizes him because of his treatment of their son. 

Despite Catherine Parr and Catherine of Aragon having very progressive beliefs about women for their time, the feminist interpretation on the lives of these six Queens of England just doesn't do it for me. 

3) Simple Set

The set of SIX is literally a stage, video screen, and lights similar to ones seen at many modern concerts. When I go see a musical, I want to see a full-fledged stage production with a ton of cool sets that have multiple pieces, many characters that sing well, and lots of amazing costumes.

*Jane Seymour is portrayed by two actresses in The Tudors. In Season 2, she is played by Anita Briem. In Season 3 and Season 4, she is portrayed by Annabelle Wallis.  

Note: I don't mean to knock on the people who put countless time and effort into making SIX the hit musical that it is.